Sunday, July 1, 2012

How To Handle the Downsides

Lest anyone think there are no downsides to my theme of getting older is getting better, let me say there are. The biggest one is the general belief about old age. That is not good. It's a hard sell preaching the better sides of growing old. Many abhor it to the point of dying too young and often I've heard people say, "I wouldn't want to live to be 100!"

The only reason I can see for such a declaration is that those people envision all the negatives instead of the positives. All through life we do that, so what's new? As my few readers can see, I'm definitely on the positive side, yet once in a while I have to do a bit of finagling to turn some negatives around. I believe it's wise not to attempt the impossible or improbable. To make the best of life you need to keep excuses out of the way. That just makes sense to me.


I recall a time when my husband and I went to see a man we had admired from a distance. We had heard a talk given by him and were so impressed that a man of his age could present such joy and vigor we wanted to know him better. We'd made an appointment yet upon our arrival his housekeeper invited us to sit in his drawing room and wait. After some length of time we wondered what the problem might be. At last he came in to see us and he was not looking good. He was using crutches and struggling to get to his chair, yet he greeted us with a broad smile and said, "I apologize for my appearance. I have no excuse but to say I'm doing the best I know how and that's all the angels are doing now-a-days!"

Funny how encounters with certain people leave such an impression on us. Our visit turned out to be very pleasant and enriching without further reference to his problem. How different have been other encounters where the person has unloaded a tale of woe trying to make hay out of misery!

Would you like to hear of my recent "downside?" I'll make it brief. A week ago I started out the day with a stop at the gas station. After filling up the tank of my little Vibe I proceded to go out the drive to take care of some other business. Now, I've been driving without serious incident since I was fifteen. I know the rules and so I'm sure I did what I always do, look both ways before emerging onto the street. So where did the yellow cab come from? I could swear it just materialized out of nothing because I didn't see it until I heard a loud bang and felt a sudden stop. Then the cab driver pulled off to the side and I managed to get near enough to where he parked in order sort out the damage. He was a young man. Rushing over to me he said, "Are you all right?" No blame, though it was obviously my fault.

The whole incident was taken care of harmoniously, including the help of a friendly policeman, a friendly tow-truck driver, a friendly insurance man and a friendly rental car agency. The story is not ended. The car is being repaired. So is the yellow cab. No one was seriously hurt and I can see a few upsides to the whole picture. I prefer to focus on these. But one of the downsides is that I'm again being reminded of my age. Although I have an impecable driving record I now have to go to the DMV with a doctor's report on my physical and mental condition and take a driver's exam.

At first I was tempted to throw in the towel and give up driving altogether. I can go wherever I want with the help of my daughter who lives nearby, a transit system on our street, or a taxi. I might even still do that, but before I do I'll go ahead and take steps to restore my driving privileges. I'll let you know how it all turns out. Thank goodness for the Upsides. Every Downside has them. I'll keep remembering to do the best I can. Along with the angels.


1 comment:

  1. Lesson learned! That's all an experience like that is,--a training exercise. And the lesson, if learned, is always a good one! I've learned that one many times, not always in accidents, but in near ones. The lesson: Look left, look right, and then look left one more time before you pull out. I know you'll remember that one, right? So, good lesson learned. Thanks, God, that it wasn't disabling to anyone, not even the cars! You weren't even found at fault by the police. So press on with a well learned lesson...and reject the accident, as though it never happened, eh? What does that citation we both know so well say? :-) Love always to my alert Mom! PS: DON'T take that Driver's Test cold...go in with the letter you got, and find out what they will be testing you on. I see at the link that there are two Handbooks, one for regular non-commercial drivers, and one for senior drivers. Tell them you want to study for your test and which booklet should you use to study for the test...they'll be impressed! They might try to get you to take the test cold...BAD IDEA...and don't be fooled!! Instead, be prepared!

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